I refuse to not see it through

I solved a problem today. A problem I'd been struggling with for a while. I was chatting with Jess on skype today and solved it. I had no intention of figuring it out. I was just talking and then suddenly everything clicked. Once you verbalize what your feeling then you can begin to process it. I didn't know that deep down I knew the answer but then there it was typed out. Ha, its funny. Jess has a way of getting to the root of an issue. She asks the right questions, the kinds of questions that lead a person to an answer. 

Here's the new problem. The solution to the previous issue is far more scarier then not knowing the answer. Maybe I would have been better off not knowing how I felt. I finally put the pieces together and revealed a frightening picture of my future. Now, my future isn't scary, in fact its beautiful. Its what I have to get to that's scary. I hate to say it, but I need to become bold. I need to go for what I want or I'll never see it through. 

I realize this is the worst blog I've posted. It doesn't make any sense to anyone who would read it. But I don't expect anyone to read it, I don't expect anyone to understand. All I know is that I need to make some changes and I need to make them soon.