The End is Near

We are officially one week from arriving at PLBC! I’m thrilled! I can see the light at the end of the tunnel and I’m just holding on to the hope of freedom! Unfortunately I haven’t seen this trip as bringing me any closer to God like Thailand did, like I expected it to. But it changed something else in me. I am a far more confident public speaker and that in itself is an invaluable change. I jump up on that stage that I belong there and command that mic like I own the place. I was never like that, especially with a mic and a large audience. Our last show was in Beausjeauor Manitoba. Sunday morning in a little baby town, I wasn’t expecting much. But it turned out to be our biggest non youth crowd, you know what? It was actually probably our biggest show yet period. And I spoke and wasn’t freaked out at all! It wasn’t perfect, that’s for sure, but I did it! I’ve grown so much in this area on this tour. I feel far more confident of my calling now.

Get me out of this Spaceship!

Current Location: wow… I could care less. Hour 12 of our 36 hour drive.

Seriously , life is difficult in Jafar. Tensions are high, sickness is brewing, and I’m over it. We left Fredrickton New Brunswick at 11 last night and drove until 5 this morning to stop at Quebec City for an hour, where we walked the streets and laughed our butts off. Its now 11 (we added an hour with the time change) and we’re headed to hang out in Ottawa for an hour. This sucks.

PEI

Current location: Prince Edward Island more specifically “the van”

The last few days we’ve been laughing more as a team I think its because we’ve gotten more sleep. We’re not on each others cases as much but I’m worried patience is growing thin again. Mostly on my part to be honest. My snarky side is becoming more prevalent and my words are like getting sharper. I’m aware that my words can cut like knives.

This week is pretty easy peasy. Lots of sightseeing and driving. Its not too bad really. One more week and another driver and another vibe. I’m excited to see the change. We could use a fresh breeze.

Emotionally, I’ve been processing a lot recently. Too much time in the van with my ipod listening to slow songs I’m afraid. For a while I had forgotten about all the garbage that I left in BC. All the stupid emotional heartache I put myself in. But I’m realizing how I can’t escape it. It’s amazing how lonely you can feel in the middle of a van touching at least two people and smelling another seven.

I’ve been thinking about Grenada a bunch and mostly thinking about how many goodbyes I’m going to have to give when we arrive back to the school. I hate to think about it. Jess’ goodbye is going to be rough. I’m saying goodbye for six months and then hello for two and then goodbye for who knows how long. She’ll be moving off to Ontario for ministry school and I’m really happy for her but it’s a hard situation. I’m reminded of my sister who’s college best friend lives in Oklahoma. Its not very encouraging when you find out that Cass and Shaney talk like once a month. I don’t like that at all. But I guess mostly I’m dreading saying goodbye to Silas. He’s become my closest boy and I can honestly say I don’t know what I’m going to do without him in my life. Internet communication isn’t the same and I’m not going to pretend that we’ll keep that up for years. Two weeks and its over. I hate it. I hate it so much. Just now I’m tearing up at the thought of it and should probably stop talking about it for fears that people will begin to notice. But I can’t continue to avoid this subject. Whenever it gets brought up I loudly tell everyone to SHUT IT and we move on to a better subject. The reality is I’m saying goodbye to my beloved brother whom I love the most.

But I have to remember that I’m following God’s direction and with Him I will not be disappointed. God, Your love makes it worth it all.

New York

New York was amazing. I’m still on a high from being in the big apple. That place was the highlight of the trip so far and I think most of the team will agree. I don’t know when I’ll get to go again so I tried to soak it in as best I could. I got to sightsee with Silas, Jess, Serena, Kris, and Tess. We walked all Times Square but the best part was Central Park. We picked up Jamba Juice and Starbucks and laid in the sun on a giant rock. It was actually one of the most relaxing times of my whole year. I could live in a big city. Maybe I should dream big.

Tour Struggles

Four migraines since this tour started.

Can you say... attack???

Satan, cut it out, you can't ruin this.

Tour Redemption

These past fews days have been difficult to say the least. I've had a terrible attitude and have been far too sensitive to everyone around me. Today Serena and I had to escape and get a manicure. I know it sounds petty and princessy but it was completely necessary. For thirty minutes all my cares floated away. It was divine. The day got increasingly better because after dinner I had a serious talk with Serena and Mark, impromptu, and we discussed some serious problems that we're facing. It was fantastic. We didn't talk in a gossipy way at all and we really worked on some stuff. I was so hyped afterwards! And then later on I talked with Jess about some stuff and that was really good too. Everything is falling back into place and I'm relying on God to fill me up again. I need some fresh oil tomorrow; I need to restart.

Tour Frustrations!!!!

(the following was written in the van)

Dear Tour,

I'm over you. I think it best to spend some time apart. And this may hurt but I'm thinking it would be best to make this separation permanent. It's not me, it's you. You are awful and I can honestly say that I hate you. I hate you with a burning in my soul. You are the bane of my existence and I would like to kick you in the face repeatedly with steel toed boots. I would like to stab you in the liver with a windshield wiper and slice a hole in your neck and fill it with bees. Please leave promptly because I can no longer be around you. Your stench makes me vomitus and your voice makes my ears bleed.

Jemima

I would imagine my life without tour to be a series of rave parties that never run out of hot men and strong drinks. I imagine it to be like riding a unicorn for the first time. I imagine it to be like finding a million dollars in your underwear drawer. I imagine it to be like punching Miley Cyrus in the mouth or drop kicking Paris Hilton's dog. I imagine it to be like a marriage with Michael Buble... pure perfection.

But alas...

Life is like when you slam your hand in the car door.

Life is like hearing your high school crush is getting married.

Life is like when your cat is murdered by your mother.

Life is like a shark attack.

Life is like when Justin Timberlake exposed Janet Jackson's breast at the Superbowl. Awkward, uncomfortable, and distasteful.

But in all seriousness, I need some prayer. Today is a rough day and I have absolutely no patience.

Update on Tour

Saying goodbye to the other tour was really difficult. Mostly to Josh. Its hard because I don’t know when I’ll get to see him again. Serena and I have talked about going down to Cali in the summer perhaps for a short road trip but who knows what will happen. I’ve really appreciated my recent friendship with him and I’ll miss him immensely. Also it was hard to say goodbye to Sam too. Mostly because he was one of my first goodbye to someone who I actually know and care a bunch about. As we hugged I told him I’d see him in January and those words seemed so foreign to me. They were hard to get out. I don’t like the idea that I’m saying goodbye for so long.

After we left the Northwest team we drove for a few hours and had a great devotion time. Serena gave her testimony and I was a wreck because of saying goodbye and the power of her story. Afterwards we prayed for near 30 minutes for our team and for the church we were driving to. The service on Sunday was nice, the people were the sweetest! They had a mothers day potluck afterwards with some pretty sweet ribs. We were fortunate enough to get showers at a local gym and then we hit the road for Rapid City South Dakota. We ate at Bostons and had some good pasta but we choked it down so that we’d make the 9:40 showing of Iron Man 2. The movie was crap and I almost fell asleep. We spent the night at a church and left for Mount Rushmore in the morning. Rushmore was truly amazing. What vision! So cool. The whether definitely rained on our parade but we tried to make the best of it. On the way to Mitchell South Dakota we stopped at Wall SD which was such a cute little cowboy town. We took some sick pictures. Currently we’re in the van on the way to Mitchell where we’ll spent the night at a church and leave for the Corn Palace and then drive all day long! Oh man… I need some more patience!

Mom

Happy Mother's Day! I love you so much! At church this morning we're answering a question about our moms. "What was the most important thing your mom taught you?" I have so many ideas because you've taught me so much! I miss you like crazy!

Yellowstone

Today was Yellowstone day. We went with the NW team and toured the park. We were still completely separated though. I didn’t know how much Yellowstone involved cars. But none the less we had a great time. We saw two bears and tons of bison. Many many many pictures were taken. Rob started two snowball fights and then Kris and Rob had one in the van…. I received some of the brunt of that unfortunately. My butt is still wet. We’re getting so close as a team. I’m loving it. Lots of laughs and I’m seeing my friendships grow immensely. Can’t say I’ll be miserable going home though, 4 more weeks is a long time.

Tour Ramblings

I realize titling these blogs by there day is futile. I won't be blogging everyday. Well blog, here's what you've missed. We headed to Great Falls thursday morning. That church was amazing! They received our skits really well. Lots of laughter and people entered into worship well. The church was legit so we had fun playing with the spotlight and the crazy stage. We performed for a college group of about 20 who normally meet in a house so they were super chill. We hung out with them afterwards at Applebees and had a wonderful time. They reminded me and Tess of the Veritas group at Eastside. (the college and twenty somethings group) There were plenty of cute guys I must say. Actually the majority of the group was men and the majority of them were living on the local Airforce base. So basically they were great guys. None of us girls could carry anything to the trailer before some guy would take it out of our hands. They were super polite. I do love good American boys. : )

We spent the night at the youth pastors house, however he wasn't there but two of the young adults were house sitting. They had a MASSIVE dog named Mishka who shed on all of us. Kris was allergic and my allergies weren't really happy either. Anyways, we woke up early and hit the road for Billings Montana to meet up with the other team. (this is yesterday) I woke up in a foul mood, probably because I didn't sleep well. I fought my attitude all day long. The ride was about 5 hours and didn't seem too bad. We had to get Jafar (the van)'s water pump fixed.... so there went all of our extra money... anyways. We met up with the team at the church was watched them perform. They were great and made us all proud. We were totally convicted by the amount of prayer that goes into their service so last night we had a team impromptu prayer session about it. It was SOOO GOOD! All of us girls went to this amazing house to spend the night with some amazing people. We have been so blessed by the host families so far. WE're in what hte tour last year referred to as "the love house" because this couple got married three years ago. They came into the marriage with kids and as they dated they took a Godly approach. They actually built this house together to see if they could make decisions together and to see if their marriage could actually last. Such a cool story. I slept on the pull out couch with Kris and we had some great talks.

Today is Yellowstone day with the other team! We're excited to hang with them today however Serena and I are dreading saying goodbye to Josh. He'll be moved back to California by the time we get back from tour so we won't be seeing him till... who knows when! I think he's dreading it even more. Oh well, I can't let this overshadow my day. God give me a better attitude today!

Tour Day 2

Hello Montana! Oh America, how sweet you are. Tonight we were in Kalispell MT and as the worship started I looked to the stage from back in the sound booth and my heart stopped for a second. I saw on the corner of the stage an American flag. Oh how that warmed my heart. The service tonight was small but they were all so sweet to us. I saw a lot to change in our service but I think I’m just overly critical tonight, mostly due to the fact that I spoke the sermon. Yea… you know, no matter how many people tell me they liked my sermon I just can’t help myself but to nit pick every little detail. “I spoke too fast and the sermon wasn’t long enough.” “I stumbled over a few words in the scripture I memorized.” “I paced” you know all the little details that don’t really matter. Rob was overjoyed by my tie in to the Brady Bunch and my analogy of how in the Brady Bunch after the second season they wrote out the family dog, Tiger, but kept the dog house because a stage light burnt a hole in the Astroturf and they needed to cover it up with something. I related that to the church and how the church tends to just cover up their burnt Astroturf with doghouses and after so many doghouses the yard loses its function because no one can even walk through all the doghouses. Rob was laughing through it and loving it. But I wasn’t too happy about it. Honestly, the pacing doesn’t matter in the slightest, and I didn’t really talk that fast, in fact I think it was nice that I was a little short. And seriously! I memorized 1 Corinthians 12:12-27. That’s 15 verses, so a few messed up words on my first time reciting it for an audience is acceptable!

After the service I was under some serious attack by the enemy. No one from the church commented about my sermon and no one came for prayer so satan knew that he could get me by feeding me lies. I got so down on myself that I was loading props in the prop box and near tears when Rob came up to me. It was totally the Lord because at my lowest point it was then that Rob walked up to me and said so sweetly, “Jemima… that was remarkable. Really, I had never heard you preach.” After that he gave me a great idea about how to wrap it up in the end, and I’m totally going to add it to my sermon. I really need to just get over myself. That’s what really needs to happen.

Ok, wrap up… last night we slept at a church in Cranbrook BC. No showers, but we had a nice carpeted floor. This morning all of us girls washed our hair in the sink. The hot water ran out before Kris and I could so we got a nice wake up call with ice cold water. We went to Denny’s for brunch and then drove 3 hours to get to Kalispell. I’ve already had a mountain dew and got to stop at Target, so I’m a happy camper. No one has killed each other and I consider this a plus.

Currently I’m at a lady’s house with Tess and Jess. Mary is super nice, her husband went away to allow us to have our girls sleep over so its just us and her two little dogs, Benson and Bo. Benson is a crack up. Of all the things, Mary lived in Corvallis for a while and that’s where she met her husband. She lived behind The Big O restaurant on fourth street. Her house is really cute and TOTALLY Montana. Big antlers on the wall and a super nice gun safe in the office. Tess looked at me once Mary went to bed and said, “That’s a big safe.” And I knew that she didn’t know it was a gun safe. I informed her of what it was. Haha. I feel right at home here. Mary and her husband Bill ride motorcycles and drive semi-trucks. Good God loving people. Tomorrow we’re off to Great Falls MT for a youth and young adult service and then we get to meet up with the other team on Friday! I can’t wait!

Day One on the Road

And we’re off! We’re on our way to Cranbook BC for the night with no show and then into Montana tomorrow where we’ll be doing a family service for a church in Kalispell. I’m pretty nervous because I’m doing the sermon for that service. Well, I guess I’m not really nervous at all, I guess I just expect myself to get nervous but in reality I’m STOKED to speak. I’ve been jealous of the other three that have already spoken and I can’t wait to get my hands on the mic! What a change from the past, eh? I used to dread even speaking my name in front of people and now I can hardly wait to preach a whole sermon. I’m not kidding when I say that I’m in love with my team. Of course I could change quickly after a week or two in this van but right now I’m loving this trip. These people are beyond fantastic and I am honored to travel with them. What a generous loving group of people. We’ve been praying for the other team that they are as united as we are. I hope they experience the power of unity like we are. They have two more weeks and then they’re done! Crazy! And we just left today!

I want to strive for excellence this trip. I know we have the potential to rock the house because we’re fully relying on God each service. I can’t see anything wrong with that. With that motto we’re sure to succeed. I want to do my Father in Heaven proud. I want Him to smile down on me tomorrow night. I know that with His help, the words out of my mouth (His) will impact the church. This trip is different then the Thailand one in many ways. This trip is really our baby, Rob didn’t plan this we did. He facilitated places for us to perform it but it was us. We all want to do some serious damage to the strong holds that satan has over these churches. I want our eyes to remain on God this whole trip, not just while we’re on stage. If we lose sight of why we’re doing this there is no point to our message.

God give me strength this trip and help me to bring your message to the churches across Canada and across the States.

Forward!

Today I pack up my room, put all my belongings in storage, and check out of this tiny dorm room. Its a bittersweet goodbye, like most are. I'm excited to finally be leaving for tour. We've been preforming since Friday night, however, we haven't hit the road yet. I really want to get going. But I'm not excited to say goodbye to this chapter in my life. This room has been my sanctuary all year long and its hard to leave it. RA was challenging, SLT was stressful, but the year was fun and this room saw it all. Praise the Lord I made it to the end!

So far this team of 9 people and one leader is absolutely extraordinary. I love each of them. Seriously, I was worried that I'd hate some people because of annoyance factor but so far we're good! haha. No actually this team has bonded very closely in the past week. We've practiced and practiced and practiced and we're ready to leave. I can't wait to find out what's in-store in the weeks to come. I have a new family to road trip with and I'm thrilled to do so. I suppose saying goodbye to PLBC for eight months isn't so bad when you're doing it side by side with your family. PLBC, you've been great, now on to tour and Grenada. Look out world, here I come!